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These questions regarding your marriage were designed for you and your partner to answer separately. Use the following 3 point scale to rate the style you and your mate use, from your perspective, to approach marriage issues.
1 = |
not usually |
2 = |
once in a while |
3 = |
frequently |
1 |
2 |
3 |
We are less concerned about safety and fairness in the marriage and more focused on the connection between us.
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
We surrender to each other and the marriage. |
1 |
2 |
3 |
We experience close intimacy. |
1 |
2 |
3 |
Our conversations include a lot of “we” phrases. |
1 |
2 |
3 |
There are times when we don’t even need to talk to each other and feel close.
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
I often am asking myself how my growth or lack of growth is impacting our marriage.
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
We do not need to get our own way in our relationship. |
1 |
2 |
3 |
Our sex life is motivated by our love for the relationship. |
|
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Total |
SCORING:
8 – 12 range= You are focused on yourself and working to survive in your marriage.
RECOMMEND: Stop what you are doing and re-evaluate the relationship and ways to begin working on cooperation.
13 – 17 range= You are focused on each other working for happiness.
RECOMMEND: Proceed with caution; continue caring for each other’s needs while beginning to identify and address the needs of the marriage relationship itself.
18 – 14 range= You are focused on the relationship and developing the Us.
RECOMMEND: Proceed with confidence; enjoy experiencing a life-long marriage while finding ways to grow the relationship.
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